I have made a lot of progress in life. I have some tangible accomplishments. This gives me something where I believe I deserve confidence but don't actually have it. The subtle art of not giving a fuck is probably a book I should read as I seem to give to many fucks. Too many times I relinquish my own standards to appease those around me.
I desperately don't want to be rejected by people, by friends, by lovers, by my family. I think everyone around me suffers from this same fear. Maybe it is those who overcome this fear the most that succeed in life. Those are the social pressures I feel, are not thinking for my own pleasure. I believe that I truly love people and what makes them tick and so the fact that I am so good at this(or at least better than most) of why I struggle with my relationships. From now on in any social interaction I must stay focused on what is going on inside my head and thinking about things other than how someone might perceive something I am saying.
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AuthorStudent to my future Archives
July 2017
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